Griffey-one day old.Sometimes I worry too much what other people think. Actually, too often I worry what other people think. I don't worry so much about what people think about me, but I worry about if people are happy and what role I am playing their happiness.
I am not the type of person to say I don't want something in order to be polite, even though I am a really dying to have it. You know? Like saying "oh no, that's okay, you have it..." when you really want it. Just say you want it. I feel like that leads to weird, unecessary resentment of silly little things. So, I feel like I do a good job of speaking my mind and standing up for what I feel is important. I don't understand the point of being passive aggressive.
With that said, I still worry to much about hurting other people's feelings. I know it is good to worry about others because it motivates you to help them, but I think too much about it. I am glad that Adam is my husband and that I can run my feelings in this realm across him because he gives me a great perspective.
I don't know if it is because he is a boy or because he is Adam, but usually when I tell him all that I am thinking about something and how I don't know if I should do this or say this because someone else might think this or do this...he always tells me to not worry about it. He says that their own feelings are on them and I am wasting my energy worrying about what they might get out of what I say or do.
It is nice being married to him, because he helps pull me back to that place when I get too caught up.
Since I have become a mom and the spokesperson for my little man, I have had to put his needs ahead of everything else. His health, happiness, and wellbeing take top priority, especially over my overworrying about what people will think.
Because of this, I have come to the conclusion that it may sound rude to ask people to act a certain way around Griffey or do things a certain way because of Griffey, but I don't care anymore. My top priority is Griffey and I hope people can see where I am coming from.
The reason I am stuck on this is because I felt rude asking people, especially adults, to wash their hands before touching Griffey. It seems weird to check up on another adult's hygeine, but it is necessary and so I will stop worrying.
I don't want Griffey to get sick, especially if it is preventable. I don't want Griffey to get sick more than I don't want to hurt other people's feelings.
Please wash your hands. Especially after going to the bathroom- that is just gross. Please cover your mouth when you cough and stay home if you are sick. Please understand how scary it is to have a newborn in this germy world, especially during flu season.
How do I politely ask someone older than me who thinks they know better than me, to wash their hands or stay far from Griffey. How do I approach other parents about telling their kids to wash their hands before touching Griffey?
I don't think anyone should or will be offended by you asking them to wash their hands. I always wash my hands around baby's even without being asked. You are so not in the wrong.
ReplyDeleteHey Kels... Ha ha I know exactly what you mean even though my baby isn't even born yet! It is like people wanting me to schedule the baby's blessing when THEY are able to make it.... it doesn't seem to matter so much that it wouldn't be wise to take the baby to church during the flu season! Oh yes, I understand exactly what you mean. You just do what you know is best. And washing hands is a pretty basic thing that people should do anyway! Good luck!
ReplyDeleteDon't worry about what other people think- especially older people than yourself. They will either respect you as a parent, or they just plain don't care about you and Griffey. If they care they won't want anything to happen to him and will be willing to do whatever is necessary to keep him safe and happy.
ReplyDeleteChurch is especially tough. I think going to church is important so I take my babies and keep them in a sling so no one can get near them- and they don't get any germs. Unfortunately, there are still some people who will get that close to you and still try to touch and see your baby, so it is a difficult decision. You do what you feel is best for yourself and Griffey!
Don't worry about what other people think. Griffey's health is paramount, and there are some nasty illnesses this time of year. Politely refuse when people want to hold him, and wear a sling when you are at church or in public. Elijah only weighed three pounds when he was born, and we had to be extremely cautious about germs. I wouldn't let people come to our house, and I couldn't accept meals or help around the house. I know that I offended people, but Elijah got through his first few months with no illnesses because of it. If people asked, I told them that it was a life and death situation, and that they needed to respect that. It was hard when they were older than me because they thought that they knew better than me. But Griffey is YOUR baby, and you are a wonderful mother because of your willingness to protect him. I have a sling that you can use if you need it...
ReplyDeleteIsn't it funny how much you have to deal with this? People just want to touch, touch, touch babies! I use the rain cover on the stroller whenever I walk her somewhere(like to school with Danica)-plastic barriers are nice =) I always have her visor blocking her in her carseat and I ALWAYS have hand sanitizer on me. Rob simply attacks people with hand sanitizer as soon as they walk in the door. haha. I've been debating on having her wear mittens at church every week. (I don't really care if they play with her feet but her hands go directly to her mouth!) I get random people asking to hold her at church but I just tell them she's super fussy and don't want to have to calm her down again. She IS super fussy so it works. ;)
ReplyDeleteAnd people ARE gross! I saw someone get the papertowels ready in a public restroom before washing her hands. EWWW! I had no idea people did that.