Sunday, May 31, 2009

Good news from Adam

So I have been able to talk to Adam a little bit this last week and he has two pieces of good news. First of all, Adam for sure gets to come home when Griffey is born! He will be able to be here for 11 days, which doesn't seem like too much, but it is definitely better than nothing. I am planning on being induced about a week early and Adam will come home a couple days before that, so he definitely won't miss the birth and we will also get to spend a little time together before Griffey comes.
I am worried about how hectic this 11 days is going to be though. Usually with a new born, family and friends give the new parents a little time to adjust and recuperate before visiting and spending time with them, but in our situation I know everyone will want to see Adam before he has to head back. I am expecting the week after Griffey's birth to be very stressful and hectic, because I don't want to keep people from seeing Adam. It is a tricky situation. My overall hope for that 11 days is for Adam and I to spend some quality time together and figure this new stage out together, for all three of our benefits. I also hope that Adam will have time to rest and spend time with family. Obviously, I want to be selfish and say that no one can bother us so we can learn to be parents together and so we can try to get some sleep and relaxing time, but I know that wouldn't be fair to everyone else.
Anyway, the other piece of good news from Adam is that he has learned that his position in Iraq has changed. He was put into the position of gunner, at first, but since he has been working so hard and showing his strong work ethic and responsibility, his squad leader asked him to be his driver instead. I am very grateful for this switch because being a gunner is very dangerous and stressful. I know I would be a lot more worried for Adam's physical and mental well-being if he were to be a gunner, and I am grateful that he stood out to his squad leader. Adam said that he felt pretty honored that he was chosen because his squad leader said he could tell he had a strong work ethic and showed it and his skills last time he was deployed also.
Overall, our situation is very hard emotionally still. We have both come to the mindset that feeling pity and misery for ourselves will get us nowhere. We have decided to just get through this year by breaking it down and looking forward to August, when Adam will get to come home for Griffey's birth, and then early next year when Adam might get a full two weeks leave, and then in April when Adam will be back in the US for his demobilization and then finally in May when he will be home again. It is getting a little easier when we can think about it in shorter incramints.
We are also keeping our spirits up thinking about going on a vacation to Jamaica next June and then relaxing and camping and playing around all next summer with Griffey. I am very excited for that time.
Thank you everyone who has been trying to contact Adam. We both appreciate it and I think it is helping to keep him sane over there! He doesn't have internet access yet, but he does have his phone and he will be able to check his email soon.

Saturday, May 9, 2009

Adam Left Today

Well, Adam left today. He got home early on my birthday on May 2 and surprised me with some beautiful lilies. He also bought me a camcorder for my birthday which I am very excited about. He felt bad that it was really a present for both of us, but I think it is just what we need to keep Griffey and Adam connected. I really don't want Adam to miss out on anything that happens with him.

This past week went by very quickly. On Saturday and Sunday, Adam spent a lot of time sleeping and recuperating from his training in Astoria and on Monday we went to his mobilization ceremony and then went to a little random waffle place in downtown Eugene. We spent the first part of the week around my family and at our new home relaxing, which is really just the studio at my dad's house. Then, Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday we stayed at the Village Green sleeping in and lounging around watching tru tv and a&e (Adam's favorites.) We also spent this time with Adam's family in Cottage Grove.

Yesterday, Friday, was bittersweet. We woke up knowing it was our last full day together for probably a year, but we decided to try and make the most of it and enjoy all the time together we had. We slept in and went out to lunch before coming back into Eugene from Cottage Grove. Then we did a bunch of random errands, got Adam's laundry done and packed up all his gear, and, of course, did a little retail therapy. We both got new shoes, because new shoes make Adam happy! He also bought me some new prego shorts, which was very sweet and all his idea.

Today was really hard. We woke up at 5:15 and I drove to Corvallis while Adam tried to get some sleep. Neither of us slept last night. It was not easy to sleep knowing what was waiting for us when we woke up. Anyway, Adam had to be there at 6:45 to check in, but he didn't actually leave until around 9:30, so I waited with him and we went back and forth between being sad at what was to come in this next year and happy as we reflected on our lives together, Griffey's upcoming arrival, and life after the military.
We agreed that I should leave before Adam got on the bus and drove away. That would have been way too hard for both of us and we were happy at the moment, so we finally said our goodbyes for now and I left before he got on the bus. There were a bunch of firetrucks and motorcyclists who showed up for their departure. I was impressd and appreciative of their support.

It is so hard to understand why we have to go through this, but I know there is a reason and I know that we will one day look back on these days and understand and appreciate how we overcame these trials. We keep reminding ourselves that this is just a tiny speck in the whole span of our lives and from this situation, we will become stronger in the long run. I do know for sure, that Adam and I will be so much stronger in our relationship once we overcome this. I didn't know we could be closer, but I know that we will be that much more welded together in our marriage and family.

As sad as I am right now, and as sad as I was this morning, I am confident that everything will be okay for us. It is just hard. I wish that Adam and I could switch places because as tough as it is for me here, he has it so much harder. I have my family and friends and church and everyday comforts here with me, but Adam doesn't have any of that, plus he is in scary and stressful situations everyday with a bunch of smelly guys and an uncomfortable bed. It breaks my heart that he won't be able to be here with Griffey until he is 9 months old. So, I am going to do my best in staying strong for him and supporting him.

I hope that everyone will feel comfortable emailing him and communicating with him, because he will certainly need it. Once he gets his address, I will put it on the blog next to his email address. Any support that can be given to Adam is greatly appreciated right now.