Monday, August 10, 2009

Ups and Downs This Week

So this is what I had posted on Monday:

Adam called me this morning with wonderful news! He is coming home tomorrow! All the letters and publicity paid off and Adam's commander had to let Adam come home. He will be here for two weeks and will be able to see his first child be born. I will never forget this experience and I am excited to tell Griffey the story of how we rallied to get his daddy home for his birth. Griffey will definitely have an interesting baby book now!

Thank you everyone for your support and love and prayers and actions taken to get Adam home. We are so very grateful to everyone that helped us get to this point.

Adam will be home Wednesday sometime and my due date is Thursday, so Griffey better sit tight and be patient!

I feel so empowered and excited and grateful and loved because of all this. I know that you really can do anything if you have faith and courage and of course, support and love from family and friends.

And by Tuesday morning all that exciting news had evaporated.

Adam isn't going to come home because his commander is being stubborn and will not sign off on it, even though he is supposed. There is no way for anyone here to enforce what he is supposed to do over there so Adam is not coming home.

Obviously this news was very hard for both of us to take and it has taken a few days for me to get out of my depressed funk. I just can't handle the emotional roller coaster that we have been put on and would have appreciated a solid answer about whether he would be coming home or not from the beginning. I have learned that the military is very unreliable and unpredictable and that it is important to not invest my faith in them. I have learned to hope for the best, but expect that it can fall through if it concerns the military.

It looks like Adam will probably get to take two leaves, one for two weeks and one for 10 days. The 10 day one is a paternity leave and legally has to be given to any soldier whose spouse is having a baby within 45 days of the birth. The good news out of all this is that all the laws and obligations were read over well and it was discovered that Adam is entitled to this leave on top of his two week one. Obviously, I am not going to get my hopes up that the military will follow through and allow him to come home for both of these, but it is exciting if it does work out.

As far as Griffey...I don't think he got the memo yet that he doesn't have to wait for his daddy to come home before he can come out. I appreciate him being a trooper and listening to me tell him to stay put but now we are past my due date and I am ready to have this baby!

I had a doctor's appointment on Thursday (my due date) and she said that it could still be another week and if he doesn't come by Wednesday, the 19th, then I will be induced. I am going to let him come when he comes, but I decided to go on more walks and eat some spicy food to help him get the point!

Saturday, August 8, 2009

Rally For Adam

This past week, my mom and I kicked it into high gear trying to get Adam home. After we found out that Adam couldn't come home, I felt pretty hopeless. I couldn't see anything else I could do. I tried calling the armory because I wanted to email Adam's commander from a wife's perspective, but of course they wouldn't give me his information because it was a privacy issue. The people I talked to there sympathized greatly with our situation and said that they didn't like this particular commander either. They had actually heard about Adam's situation from overseas already.

Anyway, Adam got inspired this past week to write to state and government officials about his situation to help provoke change or at least awareness of his situation. He also emailed my mom and asked her to do anything in her power to help him. My mom was the right choice to ask this favor from because she knows how to make things happen quick. Within two days, hundreds of emails had been sent out to family, friends, and government officials detailing our situation and asking for support and change. These emails to friends and family were then forwarded to more friends and family and so on creating a very large support base of people who were also writing to the government officials.

On Friday, we received some positive feedback from Peter Defazio's office. They called my mom in response to her letter and promised to look into Adam's situation. They had thought that this had all already been taken care of and that Adam was happy with the outcome. Apparently, Adam's commander led them to believe that this was the case, which wasn't true at all. Adam and I both thought that Defazio had brushed aside our requests for help and support from when we sent letters in April and May. We were really dissapointed in Defazio's lack of concern or efforts, but it turns out that he was given incorrect information and had dropped our case after talking to Adam's commander. I will no longer call him "Decrapio" haha.

As the emails were being circulated, Makenna created a facebook page inviting everyone that she, my mom, and myself knew to come to a rally on Saturday to raise awareness of Adam's situation. Those that were unable to make the rally were encouraged to write letters to government officials and to spread the word to all their friends. Here is a link to the webpage:

On Saturday, we stood outside the Federal Courhouse Building from 11-4 holding signs and handing out flyers to people driving and walking by. Many friends and family came to support us. I was very surprised at how willing so many people were to show their love and support for Adam and I. It made me feel good to know that I was standing up for something I believed in and supporting my family as much as I could.

Honestly, I was nervous about rallying on the corner holding signs because it was way out of my comfort zone. When my mom suggested the idea to me, i was very nervous and had some reservations about doing it, but then I realized that I was doing this for Adam. Adam asked us to do anything in our power to help him come home and help justice be served for him and for others who may have to go through this. Besides Adam asking for our help, I had been praying a lot. I was investing so much energy into praying with all of my heart to know what I could do. I just knew that if Heavenly Father can heal the sick and bring people back to life, then He could bring Adam home for his son's birth if I was truly humble and truly had faith that He could do so.
It was hard at first to fully invest all my faith and trust that He could bring Adam home because it seemed like we had already tried every option we had. I thought that maybe I should just accept that Adam wasn't going to come home and that I should prepare for what we would do if he wasn't here, but I just wasn't satisfied with that. I had a fire lit under me when I realized that Heavenly Father would do anything for me and Adam, if I truly believed He could. So when my mom suggested the rally, I was nervous, but I knew that if I was going to pray for help in any form I could get it in, then I better accept it and believe in it.

I am glad that I let my barriers down because the rally went amazingly well. We handed out many many fliers and raised a lot of awareness about our situation and about the lack of military family support available in general. Besides all of this, it was a lot of fun! It was a fun adventure and I felt happy and peaceful knowing that I was doing everything I could to support my husband. Adam called me while we were at the protest and he was very grateful and emotional at all the support that we were able to round up. He was amazed at how many people cared about him and his situation. Whether our efforts would bring Adam home at this point or not, I was happy knowing that we were able to show Adam how many people love and support him.

KEZI 9 News even came to cover the rally! We were on the news that night at 5 and 6 and it was on their website. Griffey's first rally and first TV appearance on the same day! Here is the link:

So, overall, it is uncertain whether Adam will come home or not at this point, but I have faith that all of our efforts and all the support we were given will pay off in one way or another. I learned a valuable lesson through all of this which is that it is never a bad thing to support your family in anyway you can and if you want something to happen, then it will. Adam felt our love and support across the world, because we weren't afraid to make some noise and even if he doesn't come home, hearing how happy he was that he had so much love and support on his side made this all worth it.

Making signs Saturday morning.
My mom, me, Griffey, and Makenna.

This sign pretty much sums it all up.
I made this sign with my Cricut! Even protests/rallies can be craft projects!

I am amazed at all the support we were given. Thank you everyone!